The point of Friendship
My students and clients have enduringly heard me stress that our Martial Art is more than just a corporeal discipline; that it is a discipline that develops both the mind and body. This is so leading that Soke Masaaki Hatsumi, the grand expert of our lineages, has made it the traditional thrust of just about every one of his books about Ninpo and Martial Arts in general.
The point of Friendship
The nearnessy of mind that your training demands helps you make wise and thoughtful decisions. Often, these decisions involve selecting others as friends - and all of us would like to select good friends - people we can think real "team players."
It's sometimes very mysterious why we select who we do as team players. Often we like a someone right away based on some intuitive understanding or feeling. When asked, we say that it just "felt" right. Other times we may peruse someone for a while with admiration, and build up to a formal introduction.
Friendship is a astounding thing and is vitally leading for personal growth and success. It can be found on the Ninja's Kongokai mandala used in Japanese Mikkyo esoteric mind-science training. Found in the 'wind' realm which represents surrendering oneself to a greater good where the total succeed produced is equal to much more than just the sum of the parts added together.
Friendship itself is sometimes sparked by what we call "vibes," or a strange and electric power of attraction. This is what gives it such a terrifying and seemingly magical power to tie people together so closely. All the same, our first impressions can often be mistaken. We've all made mistakes before in the friends we've chosen. Often, we'd like to ignore, forget, or believe that we had whatever to do with the selection, but we shouldn't. It's these lessons that remind us that we are human and make mistakes, as-well-as the fact that not everybody we meet will enter into a connection (whether business, personal, etc.), for the same reasons that we do. It's not right or wrong - good or bad. It's just life.
There's unquestionably no way to be 100% clear that everyone, or anyone, you select as a friend will turn out to be a good team player. But, the Martial Arts Academy 'is' a terrifying place to meet new people, especially those with many of the same interests, and often with the same focus and desire for purpose, power, and interdependence (as opposed to dependence or co-dependence) in their affiliations. Many lifelong friendships have begun in the dojo ("martial arts training hall"). Here are some tips on how to select friends that might be right for you.
[a] Look for people who share the same basic values that you do. The Martial arts teach clear values and ideas that you should know to look for. Honesty, respect, individuality - these are all good qualities that a lot of people share. Having friends with these qualities will make it a lot easier for you to feel relaxed and at ease when you're with them. You want to manufacture friendships that will be both fun and rewarding - mutually beneficial to all parties involved. One someone should never carry the burden of trying to make a connection "work."
[b] Look for people who respect your decisions. Your friends will have dissimilar tastes than you do. They should respect your free time of choice, just as you should respect theirs. Sometimes you may feel that a friend is not development a clear choice. Discuss these issues. Nothing is more leading to friendship than transportation and honesty. Discuss things with parents or important others and your instructor(s) as well.
[c] Look for people who are real team players. You know what that means: people who are willing to stick by you through thick and thin, who will be there when you need them, and will show you the insight that you in turn give back. A friend you know you can depend on is one you will probably have for life.
There will be times when you feel that a friend of yours is consistently development bad choices, or is not treating you with respect. The Ninja Warrior takes pride in understanding: try to see where your friend is advent from, and try to conclude any differences you might have. Don't be afraid to talk to your parents, spouse, or your instructor. They have the advantage of experience, and are always looking out for your best interests. There are very few things as high-priced as having good friends, and you should not let them go easily. Hold onto your friendships; let them know you value them and do your best to solve problems as swiftly as they arise. Trust your instincts and succeed your heart!
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